What you didn’t know about facebook

In the last post I wrote about removing things from life. A process that should take place often,  in order to evolve.

Same subject facebook.

Many times after using it, I felt robbed of time; of life. Recently I found a list of reasons why you should give up facebook. This list doesn’t consist of something new, and obviously jumps over benefits, but brings together many reasons.

In poker, there’s this old saying: If you can’t spot the sucker, then you are sucker.

On facebook you can check. You go to activity log,  and look for your likes, your comments, your searches. If your ex name stands out in recent searches(Man I searched her a lot.)  You Are the Sucker!

I deactivated my account around 10th of April. Now it’s 25th of May.

 

Guess what I learned in the meantime.

1.You can still receive updates from a facebook page without a facebook account.

You need an rss client and 2 minutes. This is the tutorial for a single page. And for multiple pages you can use fbrss. Finally you can aggregate  all of them.

2.Use filters in your rss client.

Let’s say you like a bunch of blogs, but there are subjects that you are not interested in. You can make your client devalue articles based on keywords. Or/and to up-value on others.

3.You can make your own feed on facebook.

One feature that is kept in  the dark is the facebook interest lists. You can create custom lists, thus creating a new feed. After you create them, wait a little, there is this “bug” that makes you wait to show it up. I abandoned them a couple of months before because of this.

Be patient, check privacy because those lists are public shown by default. Optimize you time, and limit you wandering.

In the next post, I will show how I use the time earned.

Remove!

Too many times we have too many things in our life.

My main college groups were on facebook. I needed more than 9 months to realize that I don’t need that anymore. Too much time, for little value in return. Bang!

Same reflex I have to enter on a particular forum. Log-out. + Productivity owl. It’s not perfect, I wished it could allow portions from websites available. Anyway, is great to fight link reflex. I had times when I tried to enter the same website, 3 times in a single minute.

Days after I’ve written this, I lost (again) my main income. I felt relief.

I had ideas, but I didn’t wanted to interfere and lose prematurely. Now, I had to start fresh.

Don’t help anyone!

Don’t help anyone, unless they ask for it. (at least by their look) After helping them, flee.

Two times I helped, only to regret shortly after.

 

I identified two reasons:

  • If you help before they think they need it. (even if it’s obvious)

You take away their supposed satisfaction of achieving themselves.

 

You show no confidence in them.

  • If you help when in struggle.

The reciprocity principle pressures them to give back.

If the payback is too big to pay. Sadness comes, and the helper is found to be the reason, thus hated.

And it ended

You know the beautiful girl I felt in love with, 7 months ago. We are not together anymore.

Official reason is being less attracted. Actually she was mildly attracted from the beginning.

I have to say that she is a nice person. And I mean it. She also respected my will to end it with a kiss. After a nice evening  (14th December) together she told me. We took a long walk, having maybe the most sincere talk of our relationship, also with sweet kisses and hugs.

And it ended.

 

My first ebook

A couple of days ago I published this short story (aprox. 3000 words), that takes place in Romania.

It’s not the best piece of writing, but it’s mine and I feel good about it. Now some quick and hopefully useful info.

 

 

Has been online for a week, nobody wanted to pay for a quick read. I made some mistakes:

  • Used the amazon kdp cover design. Has a limited number of pictures, and the only one acceptable, is clearly not the best.
  • Published with no marketing.

 

The alternative was to wait until everything was perfect. It took about 4 months to actually write a story of 3000 words, that would have meant about a year, or more. Too much.

Write a book

Did you ever thought of that?

I did. How hard it could be?

It seems nice to juice out my brain, trying to produce something worth reading. Realistically, probably nobody will read something written by somebody. Except me, 10 years after. Which is good enough. And if by chance, someone else enjoys it, that’s even better.

Publishing seems very easy these days, with Amazon KDP. And seems to be a lot of fun.

Finally

It’s funny and relieving at the same time. I found the girl I was looking after here. On Tuesday 13th May we met first time.

Not on a dating website. On facebook. (obviously search of single woman friends was useless) And to be fair, maybe she was the one that found me. We were high school colleagues. Butterflies and shit. Me-Tough guy. (Yeah right..)

 

The action

I was making my profile more interesting to approach with better chances. I was ready to lose the account in the process. (didn’t really cared..)When I get this like, before I even send a message. What if..? A quick read Symposium by Plato.

Symposium, Plato wrote that humans were originally androgynous and whole. There were no men or women. They felt no lack, no uncertainty, and they were powerful, so powerful that they rose up and challenged the gods themselves.

This posed a problem for the gods. They didn’t want to completely wipe out the human race as they’d have no one to rule over. But at the same time they had to do something to humble and distract humanity.

So Zeus split them in half. He split each human into a man and a woman and doomed them to spend their brief mortal existence wandering the world looking for their other half, the half that would make them feel whole and powerful again. And this wholeness came not from two perfections meeting, but two imperfections meeting, two imperfections that both complemented and compensated for one another’s shortcomings.

The artist Alex Grey once said that, “True love is when two people’s pathologies complement one another’s.” Love is, by definition, crazy and irrational. And the best love works when our irrationalities complement one another and our flaws enamor one another.

It may be our perfections that attract one another. But it’s our imperfections that decide whether we stay together or not.

Write it down

When you write down things that go through your mind, you actually download them. And make room for other thoughts.

Freeing your mind,  is always (with few exceptions)  a good thing.

Besides, you can analyze them in detached, less personal, way.

 

That’s why I write here. 🙂